You Are Not Alone
In the aftermath of COVID and amidst countless stressors with school, relationships and life, we find ourselves facing the universal experience of suffering. Life continues to throw obstacles and struggles in our path. When we are weighed down by painful burdens, it can feel like we are ultimately alone in our sorrow. With our individual sufferings and personal situations, it is easy to find ourselves in a pit of despair and think that nobody can understand what we are going through. To some extent this may be true, but we are not alone in the endurance of suffering.
When I was a freshman at TFC in the early spring of 2020, I was involved in an abusive relationship with another student. None of my friends or family were aware of the situation, and I intended to keep it that way. I was afraid of leaving the relationship due to his unpredictability and anger issues, so I attempted to keep up the facade that everything was okay. As the weeks went on, my health started to decline. I was playing for the TFC women’s soccer team at the time, and I found myself unable to keep everything together at practice. I could barely eat, I couldn’t sleep, and I began skipping my classes. It felt like my world was crashing down around me.
At some point the situation was alerted to administration and I was forced to go through the Title IX process of reporting the abuse. It was scary and embarrassing, and all of the darkness I had been hiding inside came pouring out over the course of a few weeks. I was separated from the student with a school restraining order, and by the end of the semester he was removed from campus. The relationship was over, but my depression and PTSD continued to spiral. Even though I was away from the situation, the suffering continued. I began to feel hopeless as COVID hit the world, and I was isolated in quarantine.
In the dark months of the summer of 2020, I poured myself into Scripture. I was ultimately alone: isolated from my friends and living by myself in my parents’ basement. But as I spent more time in prayer and God’s Word, I felt the comfort of His presence. As I was reading through Romans, I came across a few verses that changed my entire perspective on suffering and is, to this day, my favorite passage. Romans 5:3-5 (NIV) says, “Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”
The idea of glorifying God in our sufferings felt strange at first, like I was somehow dismissing the validity of my experience. However, as I meditated on these verses, I realized the power behind praising God in spite of my suffering. If our lives were perfect and easy, how would we be able to understand the goodness and healing power of our Lord? We would have no need for God without the hardships we all face in a fallen world. Rather than dwelling on the anger and pain that had captivated me for months, I began to focus my attention on the love God was pouring out to me and His ability to heal my wounded heart and strengthen my character through that love.
I want you to know that you are not alone in your sufferings. They are universally experienced, in many different ways and forms, by the people you see everyday passing by you on campus. Even if nobody can identify with the specifics of your personal story, suffering and hardships are what make us human. Our sorrows are what draw us closer to God, and they allow us to enjoy the fullness of His love, grace, and merciful power to heal our broken parts. Friends, I encourage you to reflect on the truth that hope in our sufferings does not put us to shame, but rather provides us the opportunity to be filled with God’s love through the Holy Spirit working in our hearts.